And it’s a Saturdayyyyyy!
Ayubowan! Bohoma Istouti for reading my blogs! Ovou, I mean ‘yes’, I’ll stop and explain. 😅 So it means ‘Hello, thank you very much for reading my blogs.’ I feel like it is getting better now, right? So for the people who are reading my blog for the first time – I’ve started learning how to greet in different languages and some other basic words. And it is so captivating! By the way, this was in Sinhala from Sri Lanka. Anyways! I hope you’re having a delightful weekend.
Have you ever tried to help someone? By help, I don’t mean like giving an advice. (We all have a Phd in it!) But just being there. Yes, it is not your job to be everything to everyone, I know! But are you there for your loved ones at least? Why is anyone going to say ‘no’? Of course we are! But are they happy the way you are looking after them? Who cares! Uh-huh… You should!!
Let’s name the person you’re helping through the situation. Let’s name her Vee. Vee is going through a lot recently. What are you doing for her? Giving her advices? Telling her that she should have not done this at first place? Asking her not to repeat it again? Or just unfriend her to get away from the problem? Right, we’re not so cruel. But since now you’ve come to know what you do, let’s see what you should REALLY do!
- You need not be a “know-all” person
Sometimes the people around you cannot explain to you how they feel. Maybe the feelings cannot be put into words. Or maybe carrying the wound with them is far more difficult than making you understand it. But this creates misunderstanding. When someone is going through a painful phase, they usually don’t have the energy to respond at times. If they are not responding, understand that they are not comfortable. Checking on the people you love should happen naturally. If they need you, they’ll reach you. Your kindness will always be appreciated!
- Don’t be a big question mark
At times they’ll tell you everything. Avoid giving them advice of what they shouldn’t do instead of motivating them. Don’t make them lose their self-confidence if you cannot help to build one. You may not agree with all of it, but that’s not the point. If you’re not sure how to respond, just listen. It’s often more helpful to listen to their sadness than to try to relieve it. Give them the time to be upset. They’re going to be upset. Maybe the pain they are feeling now is temporary; but what if you say something that will hit them harder and will stay there for the rest of their life?
- Follow up with them
Doing a favor doesn’t mean you have to get involved in every matter. You need to trust them. They’re already engrossed in a lot of things. It might be the different situation that they are facing and not the sly intention to ignore you. Maintaining your relationship might be the last thing on their mind. But if you’re presupposing and building their story in your brain, then that my friend, is wrong! Maintain the social distance with your imaginative stories! Rather you could just follow up with them after every 2 to 3 days. Don’t push them to tell you every single thing, every single day. Let them choose. Give them their space. They’ll love you even more!
- Share all your heart
Also there are people who are afraid to help others because what if you say something and then you’re blamed. Safe game, right? I don’t think so. You are here to help them. They need you. Help them go through the situation. It is ok if they have to relearn. They’ll always remember how they recovered. Everyone has their own struggle. You can never be there in someone else’s struggle the whole time. But the time that you’re investing must be helpful. Make them focus on their strengths. Encourage them. Just be there with all your heart. The magic will work!
This is something we need to start today to make a change. There are wonderful days ahead of you. Make it even more wonderful for the people around you. If they’re upset share with them a meme, crack a joke or at least drop a message. Let them know, they’ll never have to do this alone. Just be there. Don’t leave when they need you the most. There is someone who needs what you have to give. And they’re lucky to have you! You’re an amazing person!
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend ahead!
19th September, 2020